Just the other day I was watching one of our dvd's, Little House on the Prairie, the newer version! I found my heart longing to travel back in time to an era that was SIMPLE! I have always been that friend that was a bit on the edge, both to my secular family and friends and our Christian family too. What do I mean "On the edge". Well, it's kinda funny..... Some say we think very old fashion and others say we are reformers, new age hippies! What ever you call us, we are just trying to live our lives in a manner that God would be pleased! Do I really want to go back in time and live prairie style, or do I just want to not be judged?
Judged... what does that mean? I wonder if even Christian folks realize when they are judging each other. An off look at the new family, that walks into church, you wonder why they think they are too good to send their children into children's church! A cross look at a misbehaving child at Walmart when he knocks into you!Oh... have I done that.. way too many rolled eyes from me.... Wondering how on earth that mom can allow her little girl to go out in public with messy hair? Or is it just the BIG judgments we should be worried about? Oh, they are a inferior denomination, Affairs, divorce, they voted for Obama, they vaccinate/don't vaccinate.... and on and on.... What am I picky? Maybe my Idea of judgment is different than others. Perhaps I cut deeper to the core of the word, maybe I am more analytical than others. Am I judging them because I think I am a better judge,lol! Wow, my thoughts turn round and round.
I do know this. I love the simplicity of growing your own food, wearing conservative clothes that you have sewn with your own 2 hands, not wasting time,space and resources! I live in a tiny little 780 square foot house, with 8 people in it. Before I started thinking on this matter, I found myself wishing I had more house, more money, more things! Don't get me wrong, I still wish we could afford to live, but do I really want a bigger house so my family can spend more time apart from each other? Do I really need more things to fill my cabinets? Do I want more clothes to wash? WHEN... will my heart be content?.......To be very honest I truly do want another bathroom and we do have needs that are not yet being met. However, I have come to the conclusion that either 2009 or 1900 there were still judgmental people and needs that went unmet. What matters is that God decided when I would live and He has trusted me to give Him my all and let Him provide my blessings, not man!
I have come to the very real conclusion, that I have been blessed with more than most people see. Yes, they say" oh... 6 children, what a blessing!" However, do they cut to the core of the word like I have? Do they see that a confined space has created a closeness that most people never know! Perhaps they don't noticed that my babies have learned to take care of their momma, and put themselves after me (on most occasions). Perhaps they do not see that my husband,children and I have all learned that faith in God never reaches peak, it's a never ending ladder to climb! On the other hand, did God ever intend others to see and realize all blessings we see? Perhaps, some blessings are truly meant for our own learning! Certainly some blessings are meant be observed and understood by others..... but I have learned in the last year. That some things, go unappreciated by others, some things are so real to you but not meant for others to be blessed by.
So, the other day I caught a glimpse of my reflection, not in a mirror but in my mind. I was critical of myself wondering what others saw, what others could learn from me. A sense of urgency came over me..... what do I need to do to make it obvious to others what God is doing in my life! As quick as it came, that feeling left and was replaced with a sense of peace.... My God, my Father, at my time of need, came to my recsue without even a prayer! He replaced my own thoughts with His.... "Worry only what you look like to me" Wow, my ragged appearance suddenly became beautiful..........
If there is one thing I can hope my friends learn from me, it is to look to God not man as to what we should be!
Very Well Said!
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